Timor retrospect

I have been asked to give a talk this coming Saturday about my time in Timor and I am now just downloading pictures from my Flickr site and refreshing my memory (especially of places with exotic names).

Just posting some pictures (some of them repeated on this blog) as a way to help myself prepare for the talk... (note: do bear in mind, these pics are at least 3 years old so I m not vouching to reflect 100% accuracy as the situation might have improved (?) by now)


Probably the most significant time of my stay in Timor was the civil crisis in 2006. I witnessed the entire meltdown - - from the early tensions to the actual cross fire - - and was up close to the conflict as I was part of the many UN staff trapped in (safety of the)UN compound while gun battles took place outside.

My most vivid memories: a) witnessing dead and injured being carried into the compound and helping out in first aid, seeing people (two friends even) with bullet wounds and treating them b) picking up a bullet that had zinged over our heads and hit the zinc roof above us as we left the "container" offices that we worked in to more cemented/concrete buildings for shelter c) staying overnight in the Unicef office, with the Internet as refuge - blogging away and offending the hell out of the powers to be in Singapore with my angst-filled entries.

For some time after, I could not stop myself from jumping or looking for cover when anything that sounds remotely like mortar firing went off - even back in Sg.


Read original entry here

This goes back to Indonesian times when Timor was still fighting the resistance war, which ended only in 1999.

Soldiers used to send freedom fighters to 'Jakarta' by pushing them over the cliffs, to their deaths. Their wives would be told: "Your husband has gone to Jakarta". To this day, you will still find bones of those who were sent a-flying at the bottom of the cliffs, and many people still stop by Jakarta 1 and Jakarta 2 to pay their respects. It's chilling to imagine that these awful killings happened to a country so near to ours.

The Timorese people remain marked by the 20 year old conflict - you can't help but admire these people who have seen so much death, fighting, resistance, time and time again. It's no wonder that for many - conflict resolution still means settling the problem with a parang or the fist. During Indonesian times, talking didn't do them much good - they saw how the UN stood by as killings continued in the country for some 20 years. When I interviewed two 18-year-olds two years ago for a UNICEF magazine, they pointed out to me that even though they were only 18, they had already seen two major violent crisis in their lives - first in 1999-2000 and then again in 2006.



That's filmmaker Max Stahl (crouching) and Father Maubere taking a shot of him. Both men played important roles in Timor's independence. I know Max's story much better, cos I spent 6 days with him on the (bumpy)roads of Timor when we made a short documentary together for UNICEF in 2005.

Max first began filmming Timor when he and Kirsty Sword (Xanana's wife) were young undercover reporters sent into Indonesian-ruled Timor to unveil the human rights atrocities happening and not being reported. He went back repeatedly, and on November 12, 1991, he was part of the group that the Indonesian soldiers fired upon in close range at the Santa Cruz Cemetery.
Read the Santa Cruz Massacre entry here

Sebastiao Gomes, an 18-year-old boy had been killed two weeks before by the Indonesians at Motael Church while protesting for independence. So on his funeral (12 Nov), a huge group of Timorese had gathered to walk with his coffin to Santa Cruz cemetery, as a sign of protest. Unknown to them, the soldiers had laid an ambush, completely surrounding the graveyard. They fired indiscriminately killing an unknown number of people, injuring foreign reporters as well - who were later, accused by the US govt of fabricating the entire event. Max (who escaped the bullets) had the wherewithal to film and then hide his tape in the ground, surrounding his camera to the soldiers. They destroyed another reel inside the camera, and days later Max returned, dug it up and sent, the first physical proof of the Indonesian's atrocities to the world. This video tape has been credited to be one of the most powerful evidence that demanded politicians to stop pretending that all was fine in Timor. That's why until today, Max is hailed as a hero to the Timorese. He remains in Timor, ever passionate about filmmaking and documenting the country's progress.



Children. They are truly the future of the nation. And it can be quite painful seeing how so many of them may never ever get to realise their full potential. This is the reason why so many NGOs are focused on helping children - in the bid to set things right for the future - lay the right foundation. Very simple it seems: give them nutrition, healthcare, education, and care and you should really not go wrong. But so many things can go wrong. Especially when power-hungry adults get into the picture. During the build up to the 2006 crisis, we saw so many children being "used" during political protests - some were harmed when things turned violent. Each time, the knife seems to cut deeper and I wonder about the scars they suffer.


My entry on Moses


See Moses? He has a slash across his head courtesy of a machete during the 1999 crisis. He will forever be pint-sized too, because of chronic malnutrition.

What's heartening is that I do see more and more of the children of the 1999 violence being given opportunities through scholarships (from the US, Australia and NZ). Many of the Timorese I worked with in UNICEF were so bright and had so much potential. One of them began her "career" as a cleaner at the UN Medical Clinic to becoming the Principal Secretary of the UNICEF representative. Now, she's on a scholarship in NZ studying and i hope, and I think, she will probably become a prominent figure in the near future. So intelligent, so enthusiastic, so resilient. But still, outside Dili, there remains hundred of thousands of children who will not be as lucky. I only pray that with the slow improvements, more will be saved each year....



One of the literacy classes taking place in Gurusa, Quelicai, Baucau (east of Timor) - for those who are not in formal school classes - because they are too old, or can't be spared from chores, or too far away to walk to school....

OKAY, I am waay to sleepy to continue on...

But here's a list of recommended books that I have personally read and enjoyed:

From the Place of the Dead: The Epic Struggles of Bishop Belo of East Timor

Plenty of narrative to bring you back to the days of struggle and also good background on Monsignor Martinho da Costa Lopes who was Bishop Belo's predecessor Read more about him here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martinho_da_Costa_Lopes

East Timor: A Rough Passage to Independence


Jim still remains ever vested about Timor and continues to be active on ETAN (the East Timor Action Network) mailing list, where other notable activists continue to keep the dream alive - - cos independence does not mark the end of the struggle - - the struggle continues to bring the hopes and dreams of Timorese people to reality. Jim's blog: http://jasdunn.bigblog.com.au/index.do

A Woman of Independence: A Story of Love and the Birth of a New Nation

And who can resist reading a tale of activism turned romance? :-) Kirsty describes with much detail how love blossomed between Xanana and her while she acted as undercover, and then helped to hide Timorese activists on the run while working in Indonesia. I really admire Kirsty, having interviewed and spoken to her at length - up at their residence and many times swam with her brood at Hotel Esplanada. She speaks fluent Bahasa and Tetum and really has heart for the people. She founded Alola Foundation and continues to play an active part in empowering women. Stellar woman.

The Crossing: A Story of East Timor

One of my favourite books on Timor: very mystical and gives a great backdrop to the entire superstition of Timor. Beautiful. A must read to understand the Timorese psyche.

Aiight, i am beat. Gotta hit the sack. Good night and Good Luck.

tech dino recommends: edu apps for your kid

So today, we had a photo shoot with babes and mobile devices like the iPad, iPhone, PSP, etc. I wasn't there, cos I was swotting from home, cleaning up stories as a responsible editor should be doing. I called to check on the shoot and was told that there was a 4-year-old who wouldn't tear his eyes away from his iPod Touch the entire time. Scarrieeee....

But to set things in perspective. This tech dino truly believes that it's all in OUR hands - parents I mean. How addicted they get, is really how much we allow them to be. For now, Val's relationship with the iPhone is casual - he sometimes requests for it, and I sometimes allows him to use, at my discretion. It is never a given that he asks and will be given.

To be fair, the device has come in very handy at many occasions - at a fine dining restaurant, it helped to keep the boy seated for 1.5 hours (!!!).

And so, for every naysayer of mobile devices, I think there will always be a supporter.

Here's tech dino's recommendation today: a very simple app that teaches children very quickly shapes.

Toddler Teasers: SHAPES app (Free)

Val learnt what is a hexagon from this app that rewards the children with a virtual sticker for every 3-4 correct answers they get. I like it cos it doesn't say "WRONG!" but it says "try again" and then claps to reaffirm a correct answer. :-) NICE and simple, plus, it's FREE!

Tech Dino: This is why I think children's book apps rock

I went to the Book Fair at Suntec today and spotted a familiar book, "The Smelly Sprout" by Alan Plenderleith. You see, I've had the free version of this story book on my iPhone for about 5 months now. Val was not interested in it at all initially so i never bothered buying the full version. But last week, he began to become interested and has been asking to read the "Smeggy Spout" every night. Of course, my free app ends on a cliffhanger - cos you know, the smart people who developed this app weren't going to let you know the ending for free! But i kinda resisted buying the US0.99 app. Why? No reason. Just wanted to make sure that it wasn't an impulsive buy, cos they do add up!

Anyways, while strolling through the book fair aisles I spotted the physical book and was rather excited at the thought of buying the book. Then i saw the price tag: $9. Okay, 'nuff said. I downloaded the full app tonight, and we had great fun reading it, till the end. :-)

Disclaimer: Yes, I still do love the touch and smell of real books, in case you're wondering. I just think that book apps are cool too!

mirroring

Val's approaching his 2.5 year next weekend and i think now, more than ever, it is becoming very clear how much impact we, adults, have him. He's begun to mirror our actions more obviously, and especially the way we speak, often times with great deliberation, almost like a reproach.

he can imitate his teachers pretty well at school - from Teacher V's "angry" pouting expression, to the way class is conducted. just before he slept tonight, he started talking to me in a vaguely familiar manner - until i realised that he was mimicking me. Gosh! Scaryyyy! and i think he was doing it very much on purpose, as if to drive home a point - yes, mommy is quite the nag. OOOPS. But I'm glad at least i can "see" the mirroring, and thus aware of it.

The other day, it made me really reflect on my actions. You see, brushing teeth is quite the regime for Nazi Mom because i have seen too many kids go around with rotting, yellowed teeth with plenty of brown stains. Many of their parents aren't even aware that they need to brush their kids teeth and that the rotting of milk teeth can have long term impact on their children's future teeth growth. I shudder when i see my nieces' ghastly set of (rotting) teeth - a result of drinking powdered (horribly sweetened) formula milk before going to bed. So I began brushing Val's teeth while he was a mere infant - with cloth at first, and then a mini finger brush, and since he had full set of teeth, a proper baby toothbrush. It was never an issue, until now, when he's not so easily "manipulated" into opening his mouth etc for me to brush.

For two weeks, brushing teeth was getting to be a frustrating exercise for me. The toilet can get rather stuffy inside, especially when you are dealing with a squirmy 2.5 year old. And once i get sweaty, my blood literally boils. So a few times, i got real irritated, i scolded him. Then one day, the lil genius decided that he would like to brush MY teeth and begged to do so. I allowed him to do it with my toothbrush and of course, all he did was to jam my toothbrush into my mouth with much vigour. I had to really struggle not to choke! Then it dawned upon me that no matter how gentle i can be, the very act of brushing his teeth is a personal one, and one that can really encroach upon his own space and privacy.

Go on. Try and get someone to brush YOUR teeth and you will quickly realise what an uncomfortable act it is!

So from that day onwards, I began to see things more differently. First, i am now determined never to let my temper flare in the bathroom - because its a lousy thing to do anyways, and that i don't want him to ever associate tooth brushing with unhappiness. Second, i will be gentle in my approach and let him take the lead, while reminding him that he needs clean teeth or else... a visit to the dentist beckons.

And guess what? Tooth brushing has suddenly lost its edge and tension. What's more, the little boy is surprising me by taking the initiative to slowly get used to an older child's toothpaste that i had recently bought but he had rejected initially. He had been using First Teeth toothpaste (organic) for babies for the longest time, so when i bought Jason's (another organic brand but for older kids), he said it was too "hot", presumably a bit more minty? The past few days, he has asked for a dollop of it on his toothbrush, and been slowly using his finger to introduce bits of it into his mouth. Whenever it gets too "spicy", he would gargle his mouth. Today, he told me, "it's not spicy anymore" in Mandarin, rather proudly. :-) I would never have thought of introducing tooth paste this way. You really gotta give it to him for thinking up this method.

And so, another lesson for this Mommy, who will probably be learning for many years to come!